


Goodbyes

by orphan_account



Category: Men's Football RPF
Genre: Goodbyes, M/M, uncertain futures
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-07-27
Updated: 2010-07-27
Packaged: 2020-01-05 19:52:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18372941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Their last night in Madrid together.





	Goodbyes

They were silent, and it was the kind of silence that only came from knowing someone so intimately for so long that words weren't needed to understand each other. There were words that could have been, maybe should have been said but those words would ruin the moment, break the mood and maybe even if they were the wrong ones could break this connection. 

So they lay there, Guti's head on his bare chest, listening to that heartbeat that was as familiar as his own, in that chest he'd seen swelled with pride and he'd seen a white shirt nearly ripped clean off it, like it was a constricting snake. When they had made love earlier, it had been angry and filled with unasked questions, clinging onto something that they'd known for so many years, something that had always been unchanging but now was, despite any efforts they could make to prevent it. Raúl stroked his hair and Guti could tell from his breathing that he was lost in thought again (about his future - maybe even their future?). 

"Hmm?" Guti hadn't said anything but he looked up and met those brown eyes. In them was weary acceptance of what was going to happen. Things wouldn't be the same after tomorrow. They would grow apart, not so apart that they could never be together again, but it would never be this natural and easy again. They would meet again, they would try again, it was inevitable as the final whistle at the end of a match but tonight was the true end, and what was to follow would be an after-note. 

He had promised himself he wouldn't cry, wouldn't ruin their last night together like this and yet he could feel the tears spilling out of his eyes anyway, and Raúl's breath hitching in his throat as he sat upright and pulled the midfielder into his arms. 

"Hey, it'll be okay." It was a bare-faced lie if he'd ever heard one but he didn't have the strength to argue with him, not tonight, they'd fought enough recently. Raúl's hands was running down his back, making circles into it, trying to sooth him like a troublesome child who couldn't sleep. He remembered the last time one of them had cried like this, and how he'd fucked the tears out of his captain's eyes, tried to destroy that agony in his eyes, that pyrrhic goal in the same stadium he'd debuted in all those years ago.

And when he'd finally stopped crying, Raúl kissing away all the tears on his cheek, and the striker had finally drifted off to sleep, Guti got up. He stood by the bed and watched the rise and fall of his lover's chest, and he couldn't lose that feeling that somewhere along the way, life had overtaken them. Here he was, the one person he'd loved the longest and they were about to say goodbye. It wasn't fair, it wasn't right and it made him want to throw a tantrum like he was five again. 

As quietly as possible, he opened the slide doors to the balcony and went out. The air was still heavy and hot, and the sky was starting to lighten already. He'd seen the sun rise like this so many times before from this balcony when he couldn't sleep but today the dashes of colour in the lightening sky seemed menacing like they hadn't before. He heard light footsteps behind him and looked out of the side of his eyes to see the striker joining him, leaning against the railings. 

"I couldn't sleep without you there." He said quietly, the words sounding like a shout in the silence around them, the hum of traffic a few hours away, only a few birds awake and trying to sing. Guti shrugged - he hadn't been able to sleep in a while, he'd made this decision months ago but he couldn't keep his mind set on it. Then Raúl was putting his arms around him (comforting him again, even though he was hurting too) and Guti turned into the embrace, holding on so tight that he felt like he would fall if he let go. 

They ignored the world waking up in front of them, cars driving past, birds getting louder, neighbours starting to argue with each other, and the ringing of phones - their phones. For a little while longer, it was still them, and it was still all about them, before the inevitable goodbyes, this time for real.


End file.
